


catching feelings

by sewoons



Category: Produce 101 (TV)
Genre: M/M, but so is youngmin, i wrote this but even i was frustrated at their characters kdfhdj, sewoon is dense, unnecessary angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-26 01:29:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12545796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sewoons/pseuds/sewoons
Summary: Im Youngmin thinks he could live with this weird crush he has on his best friend. Sewoon barely even goes out with anyone anyway - something would always happen for him to cut the budding relationship short after one date.Until the one time he didn't.





	catching feelings

**Author's Note:**

> wow i cant believe i actually finished,,, an actual fic,,, not that its a high quality one or anything but wow SOMETHING THAT ISNT MY THESIS OR PAPERS ON THE MEASUREMENT OF ATTITUDE AND OPTIMISM
> 
> this isn't beta'd because i have no time (i wrote this during a temporary reprieve from thesis work to let out my stress) but if u want to do so then feel free to message me!! 
> 
> also i might write more stuff in the future if this is received well lol which it probably won't but u never know till u give it a try
> 
> (note that here, ryoungsen are both seniors (with youngmin being a few months older than sewoon) and dongpang are both juniors in the same high school in some unspecified place in south korea lol)
> 
> without further ado, heres my mess™

It all started when, one lunch, Sewoon was gushing on about a certain Kim Jaehwan giving him a lift home, a wide grin plastered on his face.

 

It shouldn't be a big deal — giving someone a lift home isn't that deep nor should it be given much thought, if it weren't for what Sewoon added next.

 

"Oh, and when he dropped me off, he asked if we could meet up at a cafe near school today."

 

Youngmin lifted his head from his notes, trying to put on an air of nonchalance even though his insides were churning uneasily. "Oh? The one on the corner?"

 

The smile on Sewoon's face seemed to have grown wider, if that was possible. Youngmin fought the urge to roll his eyes. "Yep, that new one. I've had my eye on their pastries for a while but I haven't had the time or excuse to stop by..." The younger boy shrugged and swallowed a spoonful of pudding. "I guess I do now~"

 

Realizing that any effort he put into studying for now would be futile, Youngmin closed his book and raised a brow at his best friend. "Why would Jaehwan give you the time of day, though? Jaehwan, the school's best soccer player, has a hundred people vying for his attention, and he picks you?"

 

Sewoon stared at him with a mock indignant look in his eyes. "Just because you're blind to my better qualities doesn't mean _everyone else_ is, tomato head." Finishing the last of his pudding, he gathered his textbooks and ruffled Youngmin's hair playfully, giving him a glimpse of a rare grin. "See you around~ You guys can walk home without me today." He walked out of the cafeteria with a spring in his step, and Youngmin lets out a breath that he didn't realize he'd been holding.

 

"Smooth, hyung. _Real_ smooth."

 

Youngmin started and quickly turned around to see Donghyun and Gwanghyun shaking their heads at him disapprovingly. He forgot that all four of them were eating lunch together... And of course they were there to see his jealous fit. "What?" The redhead retorts defensively. "I wasn't intending to do anything! And Donghyun, is that my packet of chips?"

 

"Yes, but that's not the point," Donghyun said, taking another chip before Youngmin takes it back, sending dirty looks towards the younger guy. "Instead of sniping at Sewoon hyung whenever someone shows their interest in him, maybe you should finally do something about your own crush."

 

"I agree," Gwanghyun piped up, a pitying look upon his small, hamster-like face. "It's getting kind of sad at this point. Plus whenever Sewoon hyung goes out on a date or whatever with those people, you get unbearably cranky."

 

Youngmin let out a resigned sigh - he should've known that it was a mistake to tell his meddling friends. Even though they have all been bosom buddies since they were in diapers (along with Sewoon), there were some things that one should to keep to himself.

 

Such as a long-lived crush on one of the people in their tight-knit friend group.

 

But it's not like he gave out the top-secret information willingly - they wheedled it out of him with persistent questioning, at first, then moved on to bribes. After Youngmin proved to be unflappable even under duress, they resorted to threats of tattling to Sewoon that Youngmin secretly records his busking performances and listens to them on loop with a stupid grin on his face.

 

Assholes.

 

And so he told them, making them swear up and down that none of this should ever, ever, _EVER_ reach Sewoon's ears. They complied, of course, but now he had two people urging him to confess every other day and rubbing salt into his wounds by regurgitating gossip about someone's crush on Sewoon or vice versa (though he obviously already knew about that before they did).

 

This had been going on for two whole years. It's nothing short of a miracle that Youngmin had managed to survive all this time.

 

The senior let out a groan, running his hands through his hair in frustration before slumping back in his seat. Why did it have to be Sewoon anyway? He wasn't the best looking in their group of friends (that would be Donghyun), nor the most athletic (that was Youngmin himself), or even the most studious (that title was Gwanghyun's, who would probably get a heart attack if he gets less than an A on anything).

 

But what Sewoon lacked, he made up for in multitudes with his friendly, easy-going attitude and fierce loyalty towards those close to him.

 

Youngmin, who'd suffered from several anxiety attacks since middle school, could attest to this - no matter what Sewoon was doing at the time, he'd always made time for Youngmin, his quiet voice washing over the latter like rolling waves, or sometimes just offering his mere presence, which Youngmin appreciated.

 

What started out as gratitude gradually formed into something that terrified Youngmin more than anything else - a crush.

 

(It didn't help that Sewoon was also a guitar prodigy and had the most melodious voice Youngmin has ever heard. Whenever his friend sang one of those love songs, he would secretly think that those lovely words are for him - a secret he'll take to his grave.)

 

And so he harboured these feelings for years, not acting upon them (because Sewoon deserved so much better) and never really telling anyone either (until his best friends started poking and prodding where they shouldn't). All he wants is for this to be a phase, something that will go away in time, a memory that he could laugh about sometime in the future. Their friendship is too precious to jeopardize by putting his feelings on the line, anyway.

 

That is, until Sewoon was introduced to the world of teenage romance.

 

He was a latecomer, having been too preoccupied with his music back in middle school, but once he got into the game, he was on a _roll_. Being his closest friend, Youngmin suddenly had the misfortune of listening to Sewoon wax poetics about his crush on a Son Juyeon back in junior year, or about a Shin Jaehyuk constantly sending flirty-sounding messages to Sewoon's phone every goddamned hour.

 

Not to mention all those dates people ask him on. As much as the redhead didn't want to admit it, Gwanghyun was right: Youngmin would hang out with them to take his mind off of things, but he'd also spend every few minutes glancing at the clock, getting more and more irritable each time he realizes that Sewoon hasn't finished with his date.

 

The only silver lining about this is that none of those kids have ever gone past a first date, so Youngmin could somewhat breathe regarding that, at least. But this... Kim Jaehwan was known for his persistence and tenacity - he's not the best player on the school's soccer team for nothing - and everybody besides Sewoon himself knows how long Jaehwan has had his eye on the guitarist.

 

Chewing on his bottom lip, Youngmin cast a troubled glance towards the two younger boys. "What do you want me to do, then?" He asked them warily, the tiredness in his voice evident. "Believe me when I say that I've thought of every single thing I could do to grab his attention, and in my head they'd always take a turn for the worst."

 

"That's because they're all in your head!" Donghyun threw his hands up in exasperation, Gwanghyun eagerly nodding his head in agreement next to him. "You'll never know how Sewoon hyung would actually react unless you act these situations out for real. God, hyung, aren't you in the top 10 for your whole grade? Why are you being such a headass about this?"

 

Gwanghyun let out an exaggerated sigh, shaking his head sagely. "Love has a strange effect on people, making them do or think things that they would not otherwise."

 

Youngmin listened to their ramblings while staring longingly at his thick science textbook, wanting nothing more but to hit these two know-it-alls over the head with it for being so intrusive about his private affairs.

 

But they've got a point, the senior thought inwardly, poking his tongue in his cheek. He'd always assumed that Sewoon would outright reject him, but who really knew, right? There was a chance that the guitarist had reciprocated his feelings all this time.

 

Youngmin let out a snort of amusement. He was getting ahead of himself, but... "Okay."

 

The two banes of his existence visibly perked up. "For real?!" Gwanghyun exclaimed at the same time Donghyun shouted "Fucking finally!", making several eyes turn towards their table in curiosity. Youngmin groaned for the nth time that day, trying to cover his face in mortification.

 

"Yes, kids, why don't you shout it louder. I don't think the people at the back heard you." He scowled, glaring at them. They immediately shut up, Gwanghyun making zipper motions with his hand.

 

Donghyun leaned in conspiratorially, his whispers still overly loud as he slapped Youngmin on the back wholeheartedly, making the latter cough out his juice. "But we mean it, hyu- Oops, sorry." He wiped the remnants of orange juice from the older guy's face, pointedly ignoring the death glare he was sending. "We mean it. And if you need help, you can always count on us!"

 

"No."

 

Donghyun pouted. "But my words were what urged you to act on your feelings in the first- _Ow_!"

 

Youngmin was quick enough to see Gwanghyun withdrawing his elbow from Donghyun's side. The sight made him suppress a laugh as the former tsk-ed at the latter, who was doubling over in pain, before turning to Youngmin eagerly. "So when are you gonna do it, hyung?"

 

"I don't know," he answered, fiddling with his marker absent-mindedly. "I was thinking about tonight-"

 

"After his date with Mr. Soccer Star? I agree." Donghyun interrupted keenly, waggling his brows. "I know you've noticed that Sewoon hyung's never been on a second date with any of these wannabe paramours, so you have a chance, hyung!"

 

Youngmin snorted in amusement, trying to hide the slow rise of his anxiety. There's no guaranteeing that  he'd even get a date with Sewoon at all, but the kids were right - if his feelings are reciprocated, then good for him. If it isn't... Well, he was hoping that getting rejected would quicken the process of getting over this stupid, prolonged crush.

 

Slinging his bag onto one shoulder, Youngmin stood up and ruffled both boys' hair, much to Donghyun's chagrin. "Hyung! You're messing up my hair!"

 

A grin tugged at the corners of Youngmin's lips. "Sorry. But thanks, kids. See ya round." Without waiting for a reply from either of his friends, he walked away, fingers busily texting Sewoon.

 

[im youngmin: come over after ur outing. we still need to work on that history paper... also i need to tell u smth]

 

[sewoon: ok]

 

Youngmin's heart leaped to his throat. This is it. Tonight's the night where he either shoots and scores... Or crashes and burns.

 

All he hoped for is that their friendship survives whatever outcome awaits them.

***

Youngmin glanced at the clock for the nth time that night, pacing as he waited anxiously for Sewoon to arrive. It was 6:49 PM - his date with Jaehwan should've ended hours ago. They all got out of school at around three, and the redhead saw him get into that soccer kid's stupid car at around three thirty.

 

Chatting over coffee and bread shouldn't take this long, Youngmin thought worriedly, all kinds of unsavoury scenarios popping inside his head. Just as he was about to reach for his phone to text the younger boy, however, he heard the doorbell ring and Sewoon's polite voice greeting his mother.

 

Eyes wide open in alarm, he quickly made it seem as if he'd been working on the paper before Sewoon had come (he hadn't, of course) and slouched in his chair just as his guest opened the door to his room.

 

"Hey," Sewoon said breathlessly, closing the door behind him then sitting in his usual spot: the beanbag beside the study table. Raising a brow, Youngmin did a once-over of the boy's disheveled form with his best unconcerned face and prayed to every higher being that his assumption was incorrect. "You took your sweet time. Why do you look so mussed up?"

 

"I'm really sorry, my outing with Jaehwan actually ended an hour ago," The younger of the two replied, casting Youngmin an apologetic look as he rummaged through his bag. "But I waited for the cherry pastry pies to bake because I know you like cherries and the ones at the cafe tasted amazing. Then I realized what time it is and rushed over here. Wait a sec..." He fished out a small plastic bag with a triumphant look before handing it to Youngmin. "I took one bite and was reminded of you. Try one!"

 

Youngmin stayed silent for a moment, his heart squeezing painfully in his chest as he gazed upon Sewoon's exuberant face. How was he not supposed to fall for this guy when he does things like this? Coming to his senses, Youngmin reached for the bag and took out a lukewarm piece of pastry. As he took a bite, he realized that Sewoon was right - the pastry was fluffy and buttery, and the cherries were succulent and juicy. "Thanks," He managed to say.

 

"No problem," Sewoon grinned back as he took out his history book. "Ah! I forgot - Jaehwan asked me to come to his soccer game the day after tomorrow... Says they might go for bbq afterwards if they win, which they probably will." He snorted in mock disdain, but Youngmin didn't miss the small smile that played upon his lips.

 

Flipping through the pages of his book, Sewoon continued, oblivious to the dark shadow on his friend's face, "Come with me? I don't know any of the other players, and I don't want to stick to Jaehwan all the time..."

 

Youngmin didn't know how to reply to that, considering he wasn't expecting this at all. A second date... Sewoon didn't say it in those precise words, but there's no way that he doesn't understand Jaehwan's intentions in asking him out. His heart squeezed painfully - for a different reason this time - as he tried to paste a smile on his face. "Don't you think that's what he's aiming for?" The redhead replied sardonically.

 

"Shut up." Sewoon immediately retorted, his cheeks turning a faint shade of pink. Youngmin couldn't help but to snicker. "I said shut up! I'm really nervous, but I really want to go. Please? I'll buy you more of these cherry pastries if you do~" He waved the bag of pastries in front of Youngmin's face, as if it could tempt him enough to do his bidding.

 

What he did want to say was for Sewoon not to go. For Sewoon to ignore Mr. Soccer Star... For Sewoon to notice him, instead.

 

Of course, he'd rather die before he says any of that - Sewoon looks happy enough as he is, and Youngmin didn't want to ruin that for him. So what he said instead was "fine" with a playful roll of his eyes, trying to ignore the sound of his own heart breaking.

 

The brunette whooped as he delivered a playful punch on Youngmin's shoulder. "Thanks, I owe you one." Taking out a cherry pastry for himself, he then paused before taking a bite and looked back towards Youngmin. "Oh right, you said you wanted to tell me something. What was it?"

 

There was a long and awkward pause. "It's... Nothing important," Youngmin finally replied with a shake of his head. "Come on, let's get started on our paper."

***

The next day, all Youngmin wanted was to be left alone so he could wallow in his sadness and self-pity, but of course the banes of his existence accosted him as soon as he walked through the school gates with expectant looks on their faces. However, it was soon wiped off when they saw how sullen the older boy looked. Donghyun groaned and turned to Gwanghyun.

 

"See, I told you he wouldn't—"

 

"Sewoon's going on a second date with Mr. Soccer Star." Youngmin interrupted glumly, letting out a frustrated sigh. "So I'd appreciate it if you'd leave me alone for today, because I'm really not in the mood to talk right now."

 

Youngmin walked off, leaving them standing with gaping mouths before Gwanghyun finally comes to his senses and ran after him, Donghyun closely following behind. "Hyung! But- How did that happen?"

 

The redheaded boy shrugged, kicking a pebble that made its way to his path. "Dunno. Came to my house yesterday and said that Jaehwan asked him to come to his game and a party afterwards." Youngmin rolled his eyes, kicking the stone with more force than earlier. "Can you believe he asked me to tag along? Says he was nervous being around people he didn't know.

 

"If he was so nervous then (kick) maybe (kick) he shouldn't (kick) go (kick) at all!"

 

The last few words in his sentence was emphasized by how hard he kicked the stone. So hard, in fact, that it ended up flying...

 

...And making contact with the back of the principal's head. The three froze in mortification before Donghyun had the sense to whisper-shout "RUN!", which they did.

 

Once they've gotten to a safer place - red-faced, mussed up and completely out of breath - Donghyun turned to Youngmin warily. "So what's your strategy for now, hyung?"

 

Youngmin furrowed his brows at the younger dude, slinging his bag onto one shoulder and wiping the sweat off his neck. "What strategy? I'm going to let Sewoon do whatever makes him happiest now, even if that happiness doesn't involve me." He replied as he stood up. "I have Trig in five minutes, I'll be off."

 

Donghyun sputtered after his retreating form before turning back to Gwanghyun indignantly. "Did you hear that noble idiot's speech?"

 

Nodding in response, Gwanghyun smiled sadly. "There's really nothing we could do now except wait to see how this all turns out."

***

Youngmin debated with himself for hours on whether he should accompany Sewoon to that wretched game or not, but all it took was the latter's disappointed face to make him get out of bed, cursing himself for being so whipped over a guy who doesn't even take his feelings into consideration.

 

Then he realized that Sewoon doesn't know about his feelings and grumbled some more, this time at himself for standing on the sidelines for so long. A quick glance at the clock told him that he has an hour left before Sewoon comes over, so he hurriedly gets ready. Sewoon came a little over an hour later, and they head off to the game.

 

The game itself was pretty uneventful. Sewoon, who'd never really showed a penchant for athletics or athletes, stayed quiet throughout the game - besides when Jaehwan scored, at which Sewoon would send him a thumbs up and a wide grin. One of those times, Jaehwan replied with a wink and finger guns.

 

Youngmin, who was already in a bad mood, felt like gagging. The sun was too hot, he wasn't feeling well and he had to watch this lovey-dovey act upfront; all he wanted to do was go home and binge watch melodramas (another habit he kept to himself).

 

So when the game ended and Sewoon ran up to Jaehwan to ruffle his hair like he usually does Youngmin's - and Jaehwan reciprocating by putting his arm around Sewoon's broad shoulders - the redhead decided that he'd had enough and was going home. He quickly texted Sewoon to tell him this and walked off, not seeing Sewoon's face fall at his retreating figure.

***

The next few days passed by like a blur. Youngmin had taken to avoid Sewoon at all costs, even resorting to eating lunch with his basketball team instead of his best friends. Donghyun and Gwanghyun have told him that Sewoon felt bad about this - he thought he'd done something to offend Youngmin. That, in turn, made the older boy feel guilty, but there's no way that he could tell Sewoon why he's doing what he's doing without telling the truth: that he feels like dying whenever he saw Jaehwan and Sewoon together.

 

Speaking of the two... Youngmin had heard from the grapevine (or, to be more precise, Gwanghyun and Donghyun) that they've been on several more dates now; mostly watching Jaehwan's soccer games or having afternoon snacks at the café.

 

Youngmin scoffed at this. Why would Sewoon need Youngmin now that he has a fully-fledged boyfriend?

 

And yet... He admitted that he misses the boy's calming presence. The way he'd sing random songs under his breath while waiting at the lunch line. The way he'd tilt his head up when he laughs. That weird thing he does with his eyelashes (Youngmin still can't figure out why he does that).

 

Also, Youngmin missed watching him busk. Which he did, a few days ago. But even watching his best friend from afar caused his chest to twinge painfully, so he stayed away.

 

Youngmin was initially going to leave it at that - he'll stay away until he gets used to the idea of them being a couple, and when it hurts less than it currently does, he'll hang out with them again.

 

(Except at this rate, it was going to take forever because that little twinge in his heart just won't. Stop. Hurting.)

 

Then Jaehwan came up to him, out of the blue. Youngmin would've avoided him like he avoided Sewoon, but he looked so earnestly eager to talk to him and Youngmin didn't have the heart to turn him down. Besides, he hadn't really done anything wrong - no-one had, really, the only reason he's in this predicament is because of himself - so when Jaehwan asked for some time to chat, he agreed to give it to him.

 

Which was how he ended up at the fairly empty café where those two usually have their dates, a contemplative Jaehwan clad in his soccer team uniform sitting in front of him. It's been five whole minutes and the only thing they've said were their orders.

 

Growing impatient, Youngmin leans his arms on the table and raises a brow at the younger boy. "So. What did you bring me here for?"

 

Jaehwan was seemingly startled out of a reverie, a sheepish grin decorating his lips before he took a sip of his drink. "Well... Um, you've probably... Noticed that I've been relatively close with Sewoon lately."

 

He didn't need a reminder - it's not like that fact plagued his every waking hour - but he motioned for Jaehwan to get on with it.

 

"Oh. Uh. I want to ask him to go steady," Jaehwan continued, oblivious to the way Youngmin gripped his dessert spoon a little tighter than usual. "And for that, I need a grand gesture. But you see..." one of his shoulders lifted in a half-shrug, "I'm not really sure on how to do that."

 

Youngmin stared at the younger guy. "And my input is supposed to be valuable... How?"

 

"You're his best friend!" Jaehwan exclaimed, as if it was supposed to be obvious already. "You probably know him better than anyone else. Like... Does he like anything specifically? Or is he moved by a particular gesture? Anything that could make him see that I'm sincere in wanting to get to know him better."

 

Youngmin chuckled self-derisively at his words. If he knew that, Sewoon would've taken notice of him ages ago.

 

But as much as he wanted to sabotage this guy's attempts - or merely watch him crash and burn - he knew that Jaehwan made Sewoon happy. And that, he realized then and there, is all he needed. Spending time with him, relishing in the happy memories they would make, is a much better option rather than forever stewing in his hurt and losing one of his most cherished, lifelong friendships.

 

Youngmin cleared his throat, trying to get rid of the sudden lump he felt there. "There really isn't anything specific. You know Sewoon loves music, so that's one thing. He also has some sort of attachment for that one Ghibli movie with the fish... Ponyo, I think.

 

"But the most important thing is that he likes sincerity. Your gesture doesn't have to be grand at all... As long as it's sincere." Youngmin finished off, leaning back in his seat. "Sewoon doesn't really like grand gestures anyway. It also probably helps that he seems to like you - he's never taken up anyone's offer for a second date, and you guys have been on like... Four? Five?"

 

"Seven," the younger guy corrected him with a grin. "And yeah, I know. I thought I was hallucinating when he actually came to my soccer game that time..."

 

Youngmin was on his way to accept his fate, but that didn't mean he was prepared (or even wanted, really) to listen to Jaehwan ramble on about how much he liked Sewoon. "Sorry to cut things short, but I have basketball practice in 15 minutes." He smiled apologetically, slinging his bag over his head. "It was nice talking to you. Good luck on the 'grand gesture'."

 

"It was my pleasure, hyung." Jaehwan smiled back. "Oh, and the bill's on me."

 

Youngmin was about to walk away but had second thoughts, turning back towards the junior, who looked up when he felt Youngmin's hard gaze on him.

 

"Also, this might sound cliché and cringy," He began, looking down at Jaehwan's bewildered expression, "but if you ever make him the slightest bit upset, you're going to have to answer to me."

 

And he left without another word, leaving Jaehwan with an incredulous look on his face.

***

As it turns out, Jaehwan never had the chance to make Sewoon upset at all.

 

Youngmin got a text message from Donghyun late on a Saturday evening, recounting every single moment of Jaehwan's "grand gesture" for Sewoon.

 

[donghyun: ...and after all of that sewoon hyung was just like 'im really sorry but i dont like u in that way', patted jaehwan hyung's shoulder and left the carpark!!]

 

[youngmin: thats cold]

 

[youngmin: but i told that idiot not to go with the grand gestures... those balloons floating out of the trunk of his car was prob too much]

 

[donghyun: ya but thats not the point]

 

[donghyun: hyung this means u have a chance again]

 

Youngmin's heart leapt to his throat at the thought. He did, and this time he had a plan. It wasn't foolproof - there were no guarantees that it would work - but he decided to take his own advice and show Sewoon how he feels through his favourite medium: music.

 

It had been a few months since Youngmin secretly started learning how to play the guitar; secretly, because he didn't want Sewoon to see him flop at it, and the guitar, because that was Sewoon's favourite instrument (and he, in turn, liked hearing Sewoon play - even the nonsense songs that he made up on the spot). He wasn't very good at it yet, but he was decent enough to play several songs - including the one he wanted to sing for Sewoon.

 

But for the plan to go well, he was going to have to recruit some help.

 

[youngmin: btw are u and gwanghyun free tmr]

 

[donghyun: sure, pangs ok after 9 and i have nothing to do all day. whats up]

 

[youngmin: i need ur help.]

***

And that was how Youngmin ended up in the park Sewoon usually busks in, albeit a couple hundred meters away from his usual spot.

 

Youngmin was situated somewhere along the route his best friend takes when he heads home at 4:30 - around 5 minutes from now - and he was a nervous wreck. He'd even played a couple of songs to play his part as an actual busker... Only to gain the pitying stares of several passers-by. 

 

He didn't blame them; the redhead was fully conscious of his mediocre guitar and singing skills. Heck, it wasn't as if he'd do this on any other day. But this was important, and if it meant that he had to swallow his pride for a couple of hours, then so be it.

 

His vibrating phone broke his train of thoughts. Furrowing his brows, he fished it out of his pocket and saw that it was from Gwanghyun; he and Donghyun were keeping watch over where Sewoon was busking.

 

[pang: hes on his way home]

 

Youngmin raised his head in alarm and sure enough, he could see the familiar figure of Sewoon (and the yellow case containing his guitar, aptly nicknamed Pudding for its colour and Sewoon's pudding obsession). Taking a deep breath and trying to rid himself of his anxiety, he hoisted the guitar up and slung the strap onto his shoulders, all the while counting how long it would take for Sewoon to reach his spot.

 

40 meters.

 

30 meters. At this distance, Youngmin could see that Sewoon was somewhat distracted - he was going to have to do something to catch his attention.

 

20 meters.

 

10 meters.

 

5 meters.

 

Youngmin cleared his throat, loud enough to make Sewoon stop in his tracks and stare at him in bewilderment. "Youngmin?" He gave him a once-over, his eyes transfixed on the guitar he was holding. "Since when did you play the guitar?"

 

Despite every single one of his instincts urging him to get out of there, Youngmin's eyes held onto Sewoon's gaze steadfastly. "I dedicate this song to my best friend, Jeong Sewoon." A sheepish grin tugged at the corners of his lips. "I hope you can overlook my sad guitar skills and mediocre vocals to understand what I'm trying to say."

 

Taking a deep breath, Youngmin then began to play the opening chords to the song.

 

 _I smile when I look at you_  
_I gain strength when I look at you_  
_Do you perhaps know about my heart that's like this?_  
_Before I saw you, I seemed to have a lot of worries_  
_But the moment I see you, they all disappear like a lie_  
_If you're perhaps the same way as I am, then come closer, really_  
_Ooh, I want to tell you that I love you_  
_But I can't find the right moment_  
_Ooh, I love you so much_  
_I'll give you my everything_  
_I'll try to say it now, I'll tell you what I want to say_  
_I'm happy like a fool just by imagining you_  
_Ooh, sometimes you hurt me a little_  
_But I still like you, oh_  
_Ooh, the words I love you aren't able to represent everything_  
_I want to see you today_  
_Ooh, I want to tell you that I love you_  
_But I can't find the right moment_  
_Ooh, I love you so much_  
_I'll give you my everything_  
_I'll try to say it now, I'll tell you what I want to say_

 

He'd been so immersed in the song that he didn't notice his eyes fluttering close till the last strum. When it ended, Youngmin peeked out of one eye and - to his utter mortification - there was a small crowd of 7-10 people around him, clapping earnestly for his performance.

 

But he only had eyes for one person, who was merely standing where he was with a dumbstruck look. Sewoon snapped out of his reverie as colour flooded his cheeks, before gesturing towards a nearby park bench with his head. With one last bow towards the onlookers, Youngmin picked up his guitar case and followed Sewoon to the benches. 

 

As soon as he reached the seats - Sewoon was already sitting down, all the while gazing at him with expressionless eyes - he began to apologize, his ears turning as red as his hair. "Look, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, that was probably as embarrassing for you as it was for me—"

 

"How long?"

 

"...But it was— What?" Youngmin replied, losing his trail of thoughts. "Wait. The guitar thing, or the crush?"

 

"Both." Sewoon replied curtly, still peering up at the older boy in curiosity.

 

Taken unawares by Sewoon's unexpected reaction, Youngmin replied, cheeks still heated from embarrassment and from being so near to Sewoon again after several weeks. "I've been learning the guitar for six months now, I think? There are plenty of tutorials online, but you probably already knew that.

 

"As for the crush... It's been a few years. Five, to be precise." Youngmin exhaled a breath that he hadn't realized he'd been holding and met Sewoon's gaze. "I didn't really know how to tell you because it could wreak havoc on our friendship, and I'd rather stay as your friend than cut you out of my life because of a stupid little crush."

 

Sewoon furrowed his brows, an accusing look in his eyes. "But isn't that what you've been doing for the past few weeks? This is the first time we've talked since you went home from Jaehwan's soccer game."

 

"Yeah. It kind of hurts, you know, seeing the guy you like so happy with someone who wasn't you." Youngmin fiddled with the latches on his guitar case as he continued. "But then I realized that I was more miserable without you, and when I heard that you rejected Jaehwan... I decided then and there to do this, consequences be damned. If this created a rift between us, then I'd try my hardest to win back your friendship, but.. " He looked up and smiled shyly before looking away once again. "I just wanted a chance to see how you'd react."

 

There was a brief but comfortable pause before Sewoon spoke up again.

 

"Idiot."

 

Taken aback, all Youngmin could do was gape before he finally sputtered out a "W-what? Why?"

 

Sewoon turned towards him with tired eyes. "Because you would've saved me the trouble of dating all those people, had you worked up the nerve to do this earlier."

 

Youngmin gaped for a few more seconds before replying, quite sure that he was hallucinating and that this conversation was all in his head. "Y-you... When...?"

 

"Freshman year." He replied with a shrug of his shoulders. "But you looked so comfortable with your current condition and so disinterested in anything else besides basketball, so... Yeah."

 

Finally managing to calm down and convincing himself that this wasn't a dream, Youngmin shot his best friend a dirty look. "Then why is the 'idiot' title handed solely to me? Also," he shuffled his feet, awkwardly trying to meet the other's gaze. "What now?"

 

"Because you caught feelings first and didn't bother doing anything about it for five whole years." Sewoon smirked. Another silence ensues before the younger boy continued in a smaller voice.

 

"Uh. Well... I wouldn't mind it if you kissed me."

 

With a grin that felt like it was permanently plastered on his face, Youngmin leaned forward and did just that. He felt Sewoon's lips curve into a smile under his own and wished that this would never end - when he remembered that there were going to be a lot more of these from now on. The two separated in a fit of giggles as Youngmin braved himself to take Sewoon's hand in his, marveling at the size and how they seem to fit...

 

But mostly, he marveled at how the younger boy gripped it back and smiled up at him, his eyes shining like jewels. "What  _now_?"

 

"I was thinking of getting some pizza." The redhead grinned back, nudging Sewoon's shoulder with his. "Then I thought that we could live happily ever after."

 

Sewoon faked a gag. "Sounds cheesy," he quipped, making the older boy snort in amusement, "But I'm in."

***

A few hundred meters away, Donghyun let out a whoop of delight and high-fived his partner-in-crime. "At fucking  _last_. I thought they'd never come to their senses."

 

Gwanghyun hummed in agreement, smiling at the older boys' retreating figures. "Same." Turning to Donghyun, his smile turned mischievous. "They're probably going to get a bite to eat, so what do you say to following them and demanding food for our help?"

 

Getting to his feet, Donghyun laughed and helped Gwanghyun to his. "I think that's the best idea you've had all day."

**Author's Note:**

> GAH WHAT WAS THAT
> 
> im still surprised that i managed to finish something because im more of a "here's a prompt i thought up of and never actually write it down" type of girl. or i write it down and get writer's block after a couple of pages lmao
> 
> the song youngmin sang is acourve's confession! i was actually searching for cute confessions songs earlier today when i remembered that he and donghyun sang this in their liev --; the lyrics matched well with his situation too so i went forth and used it! here's the original [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7FyHjWSlpQ%22) and a [youngdongpo mashup](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2td0De48ivI) someone did.
> 
> anyway thank u for tolerating my mess!! please leave comments on what i should improve on below ♡ also if u want to talk about this (or ryoungsen in general) my twitter id is @sevvoons!


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